Greedy

Submissive girls are apt to be greedy. I don’t think I’ve ever heard one complaining that she gets too much spanking, is just dying for a rest from all these relentless impacts on her ass. But I’ve heard a lot of them rueing the fact that they don’t get nearly enough, haven’t been spanked in a week, or a month, or a lifetime. Or that it’s the wrong kind of spanking, or even the wrong spanker. Of course I could come over all domly and tell them, it’s not for a submissive girl to decide when or how she gets a spanking, she’ll get one when she needs one, etc, etc. I could say that; but I don’t think they’d be listening. Their longing for a spanking is just too great.

So what’s a girl to do if she isn’t getting enough? Let me say first of all, that I am with Gordon Gekko on this; ‘greed is good’, if only in the realm of d/s. I like it when women want more and more; I like to give it to them. But what should I say to her if she doesn’t belong to me, if her dom is another guy? A guy who, whatever his undoubted qualities, is less engaged in the spanking process than she is.

I don’t know if I have any handy tips. It depends on the people involved. Some girls provoke. They deliberately do things they ought not to, in the expectation of a punishment. If that works for you, fine. Personally, I prefer a girl to be good. I might very occasionally try a punishment scenario, just for fun (‘so, the dog ate your homework; hmmm…’) But it’s not really my style. I suppose it could become so if I met a girl who really got off on this. I’m a very adaptable dom, and there are few things I can’t be enticed into. But, as I say, engineering a punishment is something I tend to take a dim view of. It’s manipulation, and if there’s any manipulating to be done, I know who is going to be doing it.

A girl who’s trying to provoke her dom into a spanking always runs the risk that she ends up topping from the bottom. I’m not a purist; I realise a certain amount of this is always going on, in any d/s relationship. It’s a two-way street, after all. But at the end of the day, she doesn’t really want to be the one making the running. She wants to be overcome, not obliged.

Even so, one thing that never does any harm is communicating. If you need more spanking, simply let him know. That’s not topping. But what if that doesn’t work? You have to try and explain, difficult though it may be, exactly what it is about spanking that excites you so. And when you do get spanked, don’t be afraid of letting him know how it feels. Most doms, I think, enjoy getting a response. It’s not enough to spank; he wants to know the spanking is achieving its desired effect. I don’t necessarily mean every girl should be a screamer. But suffering in a passive way runs the risk of him thinking it isn’t doing much for you. If he can see the profound effect, he’s more likely to do it again.

I can’t teach you what body language or sounds will inflame him. I know one thing that works for me. It’s when I see she’s a bit scared, rather apprehensive about what she’s got herself into, wondering if this might end up going too far. Usually she goes a bit quiet. That’s very arousing for me. I don’t like her accepting a spanking with too much alacrity. A slight degree of resistance, or at least hesitation, gets my adrenalin flowing. But of course if he’s a reluctant spanker in the first place, you run the risk of giving off the wrong signals.

It’s a difficult business, this spanking caper. You might think, oh, he likes to spank, you like to be spanked, off you go and have lots of fun. But you learn eventually there’s more to it than that. Still, things really worth doing are never easy, are they?